I had fallen deeply in love with Indira Gandhi and had sex life with her for 12 years: M. O Mathai and his untold story

In Mathai’s autobiography, Reminiscences of the Nehru Age, he allegedly wrote a chapter entitled ‘She’ which describes a ‘passionate’ Indira with whom he apparently had a twelve-year-long sex affair. The version of the alleged chapter widely available online on various right-wing websites has lines such as ‘she has Cleopatra’s nose, Pauline Bonaparte’s eyes and the breasts of Venus‘. The chapter says her ‘cold and forbidding’ reputation was only a measure of ‘feminine self-protection’; she was ‘exceptionally good in bed’; ‘in the sex act she had all the artfulness of French women and Kerala Nair women combined’; she loved ‘prolonged kissing’, and she became pregnant by the author and had to have an abortion. The unverified online version quotes Indira as saying she could not bear to ever be married to a Hindu, and once said, ‘I like Queen Bee. I would like to make love high up in the air.’ At the end of the chapter is the line ‘I had fallen deeply in love with her.’

She‘, containing highly explicit details of an apparently intensely physical relationship, was never published. Frank, however, believes Mathai did write it and that Maneka Gandhi circulated this same chapter (which is now available online) after she fell out with her mother-in-law. The publisher of Mathai’s book, Narendra Kumar of Har-Anand Publishers, says that he cannot verify if Mathai wrote ‘She’ as the publishers did not receive the chapter with the original manuscript.

Indira’s relationship with Mathai has never been clarified. Nehru’s biographer Sarvepalli Gopal says Indira and Mathai ‘enjoyed baiting one another’ and describes the relationship as one where ‘Indira encouraged him [Mathai] beyond normal limits‘. Frank writes that in her interview with B.K. Nehru, who had no reason to bad-mouth Indira, he suggested that there might have been some sort of affair between Indira and Mathai and that the ‘She‘ chapter contains ‘more fact than fiction’.

‘Mathai did a lot of damage to Nehru,‘ says Natwar Singh, the close associate of the Nehru-Gandhi, former Congress politician and bureaucrat in Indira’s Secretariat from 1966 to 1971.47 ‘He was close to the CIA [Central Intelligence Agency]. Between 1946 and 1959 every single paper that passed Nehru’s desk went to the CIA. As for the affair, he spread all these tales for his own reasons.’ Mathai would quit Nehru’s service in disgrace in 1959 after Feroze Gandhi’s friend Nikhil Chakravartty exposed his various shady dealings in property and cash stashed abroad. His writings on Indira thus could well have been the vengeful outpourings of an embittered individual.

Mathai was “she’s” secret lover, his book said it!

In his book Mathai has shown immense respect towards Nehru but he has even openly spoken out of the intimate relationship Nehru had with Edwina, Padmaja Naidu (Sarojini Naidu’s daughter), Mridula Sarabhai and many others. Nehru was deeply busy in impressing these ladies that he forgot to take care of India. Eventually, India lost the 1962 Indo-Pak war.

In that book there was a chapter named “She” which was withdrawn at the last moment. This chapter has pin to pin details of Mathai’s sexual relationship with Indira Gandhi.

Mathai had such a romantic affair with Indira Gandhi that it created distress in Indira Gandhi’s home. It is known fact that Nehru too didn’t like Feroze Gandhi. Mathai says that he was Indira’s lover for twelve long years and even made her a pregnant once. But she had an abortion.

Indira Gandhi told Mathai “I want to sleep with you, take me to the wilds tomorrow evening. Mathai replied that he didn’t have any experience with a woman before. So she gave him two books, one was of Dr Abraham Stone about sex and female anatomy.

She asked him to take her out into the wilds after sundown. She always held Mathai tightly and called him as “Oh, Bhupat I love you”. Indira gave him the name Bhupat, the dacoit and Mathai called her as Putli, the dacoitess. He said that he never knew what real sex was until he had Indira.

The chapter says her ‘cold and forbidding’ reputation was only a measure of ‘feminine self-protection’; she was ‘exceptionally good in bed’; ‘in the sex act she had all the artfulness of French women and Kerala Nair women combined’. Mathai also says that she loved prolonged kissing.

Why did Mathai end his relationship with Indira?

Though he had a very good sexual relation with Indira Gandhi, why did he distance himself from her? Indira Gandhi didn’t have affair with just one man. One day when Mathai came to meet Indira Gandhi, he saw her with Dhirendra Brahmachari, a tall man who laid with Indira Gandhi. When Mathai saw Indira with him, he said her that “I had something to tell you, but I shall say it later”. This was the end of his relationship with Indira Gandhi.

Dhirendra Brahmachari was a yoga instructor of Indira Gandhi. The yoga posture soon turned sexually.

Indira Gandhi once said that she could not bear to ever be married to a Hindu but she got laid with a Hindu. She also said that ‘I like Queen Bee. I would like to make love high up in the air.’ 

At the end of the chapter, Mathai wrote ‘I had fallen deeply in love with her.’

Other stories in his book

On the 18th November 1947 she took me to her room and kissed me full on the lips and told me “I want to sleep with you; take me to the wilds tomorrow evening”. I told her that I had very little experience with women. She said “all the better”. So on the 19th, which was her birthday, we went driving out and chose a place in the wilderness. On
our way back I told her that I had some revulsion about milk in her breasts (though she had stopped breast-feeding the child a while ago). Afterward, she did something about it and soon went completely dry. She
discovered that I knew little about sex, and gave me two books, one of them by Dr. Abraham Stone about sex and female anatomy. I read them with profit.

She was not promiscuous; neither did she need sex too frequently. Butin the sex act she had all the artfulness of French women and Kerala Nair women combined. She loved prolonged kissing and being kissed in
the same fashion. She had established a reputation for being cold and forbidding. She was nothing of the kind. It was only a pose as a feminine measure of self-protection. She was a passionate woman who was
exceptionally good as a wriggler in bed. During the twelve years, we were lovers, I was never satisfied with her.

Progressively she became hostile to the fat female family friend who used to come to stay. Ever since she saw the family friend welcoming me on arrival with a hug and an innocent kiss on my cheek, she became jealous and livid with rage against the family friend. Occasionally the family friend used to ask me to take her and my “she” to a good cinema whenever there was one in town. My “she” could cleverly see to it that I did not sit near the family friend but only next to her as third in the row.

The day before the next time the family friend was expected to arrive “she” asked me to take her out into the wilds after sundown. In the car, I asked her ‘what is the big idea? I have some urgent work to do’. She
replied ‘as long as the fat one is here, I will keep away from you because I do not want you to touch me after she has touched you.’ I assured her that I had absolutely no interest in the fat one. ventually, ‘she’ got used to the fat one’s friendly welcome and departure gestures to me.

She tried hard to persuade me to occasionally go up to her room while her husband was there, sit down and talk to them both. I told her that I had no intention of practicing deception. So she used to bring him to my study occasionally.

She used all kinds of devices to ensure that her children spent as little time with their father as possible. She told me that she did not want any influence of their father on them because she was convinced that his influence would be bad for them. She concluded by saying: “I do not want my children to grow up as champion liars.” This was one of
the reasons why her husband was shifted to a separate room.

Once I mentioned to her something which her husband had told me. She said: “Don’t believe a word of what he says. I have learned it to my bitter cost”.



The only fact here is that Mathai was Nehru’s Secretary and Indira Gandhi when separated from her husband, came to live with her father Nehru. Our people are good in creating the mountain out of a mole, to defame others, especially women. This is not about supporting any party, this character assassination has to stop, we should know better act mature. People belonging to any political party, should not have to go through this.

This only reminds me of the fact that in this great country even Seeta was defamed.

Now , coming to Mathai. Indira Nehru had at least 4 recorded relationships with different men at different times of her life. Mathai was one of them. Considering how good she was at hiding things when she quietly eliminated Feroze Gandhi as he was becoming a cause for concern to her, it would be no surprise if Mathai is indeed her another secret husband.

Her history is dark. Do not trust Indian books on her, refer to what outsiders had to say during her career and life.


Sources: https://groups.google.com/forum/m/#!topic/soc.culture.indian/U9b0jJdpzrw